From Pub Crawls to Gaming Nights: How Socialising Changes in Your 30s

In my twenties, I was out four times a week, darting here, there, and everywhere. Nights out, catching up with friends, spontaneous gathering - it felt effortless. Now, in my thirties, my social calendar has shifted dramatically. I’m lucky if I can squeeze in a gaming night once a fortnight. (My top PS5 games at the moment are UFL, Ready or Not and EAFC of course so I squeeze in a lot in fairness.)

But it’s not just age. My social habits have evolved with my lifestyle and circumstances. Working from home means that unless I have a meeting, or I make a rare trip to the Co-op, I barely see anyone. I’m naturally sociable, but now I often find myself seeking interaction in more structured way; joining a 5-a-side football game, not because I know the people, but because it’s the only way to get enough players. I expand my social circle through my partner’s friends or my neighbourhood, which has encouraged me to meet new people and form unexpected connections.

The Pandemic and Its Lasting Impact

The COVID-19 pandemic accelerated changes in social behaviour. According to a McKinsey report in 2023, people turned to digital interactions more than ever, and many of these habits have stuck. While online platforms help maintain friendships, they can’t fully replace casual, face-to-face encounters, leaving those who work from home especially isolated.

Socialising From Your 20s to Your 30s

Survey data from the UK’s Community Life Survey 2023/24 shows that adults in their 30s and 40s are socialising less frequently than in their twenties. Work commitments, family responsibilities, and lifestyle shifts mean that social gatherings are more structured, less spontaneous, and often revolve around organised activities like sports clubs, classes, or gaming nights.

Interestingly, younger adults often socialise through fitness or hobby-based groups. For example, 37% of Gen Z respondents in a Gym Group survey said exercise is a social activity, with 42% making friends through fitness. For those of us in our 30s, similar principles apply: structured activities create opportunities to meet people, even strangers, because life doesn’t always allow the old spontaneity. I go to the gym, swim and run very sporadically although Strava keeps me on course but this isn't socialising for me, this is for my health.

Lifestyle Changes and Social Dynamics

As we transition into our 30s, lifestyle changes play a significant role in our social habits. Increased work commitments, family responsibilities, and financial constraints often limit opportunities for socialising. The Community Life Survey 2023/24 indicates that while many adults still engage in social activities, the frequency and nature of these interactions have evolved, with a notable shift towards more structured and less frequent gatherings.

Reimagining Social Connections

Despite these challenges, individuals are finding new ways to connect. Online gaming, virtual meetups, and fitness classes have become popular alternatives to traditional socialising. These platforms offer flexibility and convenience, allowing individuals to maintain social connections without the constraints of time and location.

For me we have Tuesday nights. It starts early on in the day on the WhatsApp chat and then after everyone has gone to bed the PS5 gets switched on. Competitive and sometimes toxic football tournaments ensue.